i’m a bit (ok, a lot) sentimental these days. and surely it doesn’t help that i’m indulging in sappy music and sad thoughts. as for the music, of course set in a minor key, this is my current favorite: christina perri’s jar of hearts.

i have no broken heart. that’s about the only thing that i feel is set right at the moment. then again, circumstances could be easier. but we’re working on that.

i am sad about my grandma. a few days ago i realized how little time has passed since she finally was relieved of her pain, barely six weeks. maybe i’ve just been neglecting my feelings these past weeks and now they are coming back in full force, maybe it’s a normal step in the grieving process…i have no idea. what i know is that it’s about to throw me off track again.

CUT

this is how this post started. and then i got an email. an email that i have been waiting for for weeks (and wished to receive for months). i don’t want to go into the specifics right now. i still have to be  patient for a little longer (about 4 weeks) and then i can fill you all in. let’s just say that the email started with congratulations

i’m elated, excited, shocked, relieved, startled, happy…all at the same time. and i am happy to be able to share this moment with the special people in my life (except for my mom who i cannot call at this time of night because she would get a heart attack).

isn’t it funny how our mood can swing from one end of the spectrum to the other within a split second? i realize i sound like i am bipolar or something but that is not my intention. rather i mean how some news you have been waiting for so long is finally there, and it’s the result you wanted, and all the worries are pushed away and all that is left is joy and thankfulness and a little disbelief. and impatience because of the said wait until mid-march.

oh boy, how am i supposed to go to bed tonight? before the email i was ready to fall asleep on the couch. now, an hour later, i am so full of adrenalin i could run a 10k (if only i would run, lol).

franzi